Greg Fischer has giant gonads.

Takes really big ones to declare a Cardinal Red Day for the University of Louisville in a city where approximately 35% of the residents are fans of a rival team. He has reportedly been the target of barbs from a few angry UK fans.

Long overdue, someone in a position of power officially recognizing what should have been obvious. No merit in being wishy-washy about who owns the town.

The results are in, and the Mayor has announced that Louisville has set the world record for the number of people wearing and displaying the color red in a single day, honoring the University of Louisville basketball team.

“We have no idea what the existing record was–or even if there was a previous record–but we know we smashed it,” Fischer said in a news release. “You can’t go anywhere today without running into a sea of red.”

Occasional sightings of pickup trucks with giant blue flags didn’t get counted.

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By Charlie Springer

Charlie Springer is a former Louisville editor and sportswriter, a public affairs consultant, a UofL grad and longtime fan.